The Three Fundamentals of Having Potential

The Difference Between a Loser and Someone With Potential

“But he has SO much potential” She yelled, getting frustrated with her friends for telling her once again what a loser he is. Nobody seems to see it the way that she does, not even himself. All he needs is a bit of encouragement and a solid support system from her, and he can accomplish great things. Just one more month, she continues to tell herself, surely this time he’ll finally wake up and start to work they way she knows he can. But the next month she’s in the same place, she’s sure more then anybody else that he’ll be fine one day.

The issue is that he won’t, and you’ll never get him to see that sweetie. Why, because he’s a freaking loser…And you’ll never get him to change.

The reason? Because HE doesn’t want to change. Even saying things like, “I’ll Change” or “I want to change” without actually doing it, proves it. He’s a loser! He’s exactly where he wants to be, and everyone can see through his crap, it’s time to jump on the bandwagon. That’s not to say, however, that there aren’t men who have potential. There’s just a distinct difference between the two, and it’s not up to you to decide where that line falls.

There are three huge fundamental mantras the those with potential have, that losers just don’t. If they have potential, they fulfill all three fundamentals. So whether you’ve come across this post trying to change your world, or figure out if the guy you’re dating has potential, you’ve got a solid checklist to work with.

I’ll stop being a jerk (kind of), and get to it, ready?

Fundamental #1 – They Recognize Their Potential

People who are losers never say to themselves positive affirmations. They firmly believe that the world has dumped them in this situation, and there’s no way out.  The tend to blame the world around them, and refuse to accept any responsibility themselves. They never think bigger, they never work for more, it’s just where they’re at, and they won’t change. The Loser chooses to believe that life just goes on, that they can’t change it, and therefore they don’t attempt to do anything…at all honestly.

They could be out of work, and instead of searching for a new job or doing anything, they decide to just mess with the government. They choose to sit around, watch TV, and just be totally miserable. Essentially, they don’t believe they have potential, and they take it out on the world around them. So when they loser is spiting you and being stubborn, it’s because they honestly don’t want to change. Generally, their life is spent numbing themselves and focusing on partying so they don’t have to look at themselves in the mirror.

However, on the other hand the man with Potential realizes they do have potential. They wake up, and even if they are in the worst situation, they try to make the best out of each day. They try and stay positive amongst everything, and will do anything and everything to make sure that they try and do better. No matter what the stakes, they are working…which brings me to the second fundamental.

Fundamental #2 – They Are Working Towards Something

The Loser never bothers to try and make plans. Often times they create self-fulfilling prophecies as a result of being a loser. They don’t do the dishes because they’ll just get dirty. They don’t look for work because they won’t find one. They spend their money on booze because it’s easier to numb pain then to look at it. They do it all so they don’t have to work towards anything. They are justifying their own excuses for laziness and mediocrity by being lazy and mediocre.

The man with potential is working towards something in his life, all the time. Let me make this clear, he isn’t working towards living life to the max necessarily, just living life the way he want to. If you don’t want to climb a different mountain everyday and swim across the ocean for the sake of it that’s absolutely fine. You don’t need to have that goal to have potential. Shoot, even if you aren’t sure of what that goal IS, that’s fine. If he knows what he wants, every step he takes should be dedicated towards doing that.

If he doesn’t know what he wants, he should be putting in the time to try and find that out. He should be exploring everything, testing anything, and doing remarkable things. Just because you put in minimum effort doesn’t mean you’ve tried anything either. That only means you attempted to try something and it was too hard for you, so you gave up and went back to numbing yourself because it’s pointless. If you don’t know what you want, you should be putting in 100% of your effort ALL THE TIME to find that.

Working towards something is probably the most important fundamental to consider when deciding to go from a loser to a man with potential.

Fundamental #3 – They Are Slowly Disposing of Self-Destructive Habits

These can be just about anything. There’s a quote from the movie Get Him to The Greek that I think about often when I look at my life.

“There’s nothing in this world that you can’t turn into Heroin.” – Jackie Q

That’s both the worst and best quote when it comes to developing goals. I apologize for the graphic nature of said quote, but it rings true in this case.  Self-Destruction and Complacency? Those are two of the most addictive things on the planet in my mind. They are so easy to fall into, and once your there, it can be hard to pull yourself out. Mind you, I’m not just talking about Drugs and Alcohol either, I also mean Television, Games, anything that drags your attention away from your focus without being able to get back on track. Remember an addiction isn’t just a substance, psychology today defines addiction as

“Addiction is a condition that results when a person ingests a substance (e.g., alcohol, cocaine, nicotine) or engages in an activity (e.g., gambling, sex, shopping) that can be pleasurable but the continued use/act of which becomes compulsive and interferes with ordinary life responsibilities, such as work, relationships, or health”.

But I have some good news. I’ve experienced the shift firsthand between falling apart and growing up. The good news is that developing yourself and becoming whole, developing your world and the other aspects of growth? They can feel pretty addictive to. When you start to grow, when you feel yourself overcome those walls, that’s an amazing feeling. More then that however, it makes you want to do it again and again, getting further and further into your goal! It develops a momentum that can be hard to describe at times!

On top of that, as men with potential grow, they actually start to dispose of these destructive habits. They begin to realize that those habits aren’t good for them, and as a result they decide to shed them. It helps them move forward by ditching their baggage. They change, their world changes, and most importantly, how they view themselves changes as well.

The realize finally, that they aren’t a loser, but the important part here is that its a process THEY have to do. No amount of yelling or getting after them is going to change their minds. Once they decide to change, that’s when they need the help, but before that you aren’t going to get anywhere with them!